Burgundy Polo Neck (ASOS | Pull & Bear)
Zara Boots (Similar at Topshop and Office)
People who have things going for them- who are beautiful, or cool, or getting a good degree, or running a business, or in a great job, or just simply happy, hardly ever leave negative comments online. There are so many times I’ll scroll past an outfit that I don’t like, or a selfie that I didn’t think was flattering, but never have I felt it necessary to leave a comment expressing that. Because, firstly, I don’t have time for that. Secondly, if it’s not positive energy, why spread it? And lastly, I’m just not too obnoxious, self-absorbed and narcissistic to realise that other people’s worlds do not revolve around me and my perception. I’m sure you don’t always like my outfits, and you just close the browser and hope that the next blog post is better.
I’m very good at ignoring the trolls. Especially the ones who throw around comments like ‘ugly’. Because those people are hurting, and they never are the good-looking or successful ones. Therefore, I only ever feel sympathy for them. Earlier this week, someone left such a comment on an Instagram picture of mine here and quite a few of my followers defended me. I thought that was so sweet! All I felt was complete love and happiness about the fact that I’m building such a loyal following who will go out of their way to put some silly girl in her place. I even had to tweet my pure elation about the situation.
Can women just stop bringing women down please? It’s not cute, it’s not cool, it’s corny, it’s lame, and I find it difficult to believe that it even helps your dwindling self-esteem. Stop it right now. You’re dividing the army and fucking up the formation. There’s a difference between constructive criticism and hating and I can tell the difference. I accept constructive criticism and even if I might not always agree with it, I recognize that it wasn’t coming from a bad place. If I admire a woman, it doesn’t even occur to me to hate on her. I want to celebrate her, I want to learn from her and sometimes, I even want to build a relationship with her. Hence, Top Girl.
Last night, some girl on twitter was trying to be funny and quoted a tweet that had a photo of me from the post yesterday with some silly words about how I was wearing a blanket. I knew she was doing it for retweets and some cheap laughs. But, I was in the mood to shut her down. That’s another thing we have to stop doing- ridiculing other people for cheap thrills and retweets. I responded and my twitter fam were pretty impressed and hyped about my clapback, especially as I never clap back. It was all really funny and all fun and games. But this morning, a girl who was also trying to support me dug out pictures of the hater where as you would expect, she didn’t have the best style (I told you, girls with cute style don’t hate) and challenged her for coming at me. I appreciated the support and I really appreciate every single time someone shows me love. However, it just made me feel a little uncomfortable as I felt we had taken it to a place where it was no longer funny, but actually quite mean. I ended up feeling guilty and sorry for this poor girl who came at me, who probably has really low self-esteem and was just trying to use me to get some attention and affirmation.
Basically, what I’m saying is that I ended up feeling bad for clapping back at this girl and next time, I’ll (try to) just be silent. An eye for an eye will make the whole world blind.